One close aunt of mine was diagnosed of having a cyst in her ovary.
I knew that she was scared when she called just now asking for my mom.
I know a cyst is not cancerous and not that dangerous but still if one is to get it, u will still feel scared despite all the assurances.
Sometimes when i think of my family, i feel grateful.
My relatives are all having troubles of their own.
Financial problems, health problems, family problems, etc.
I feel that somehow i am numb with all these problems. As if i do not care.
Like my heart go cold, ice cold.
Not that i do not want to know or care about them but somehow i am dragged into this mess by one way or another.
I plastered smiles on my face and offer words of encouragement and advise but sometimes, i feel nothing. Empty.
I wonder why.
Is it becoz i am too used to hearing all these problems? Maybe.
I know that some of my relatives might say that i am a snob, a know-it-all and stuff. Well, kind of true.
I wonder myself what type of person am i.
I cannot stay angry with one person for long. I cannot show affection to someone i love. The only thing i can do is smile and laugh.
Hmm... sometimes i think too much.
Maybe i feel this way because i do not like to be bog down my emotional problems.
